Okay, so a prude, a yuppie, a hippie, and this dopey looking guy with a small dick walked into a bar . . .
Image by pimpdisclosure
the pimp chronicles
A random moment in time captured at a bar in Oakland.
For a picture that looks like it’s been put through a blender, run over by a Mack truck, and slapped with 5 dildos, I worked and dicked around with it for a while over the course of a few months. My workflow for completing an image obviously starts with taking the shot. But when I move them to my computer, I work on them at my own pace.
Sometimes I bang it out the same day. Other times I’ll toy around with it and forget about it, but go back to it while browsing for something to do.
Hence the deal with this one.
So when I uploaded it to the web upon finishing, something caught me off guard. I know those motherfuckers! I swear I do, I’ve known them for months!
The overweight chick sitting at the bar on the left? She is boring. She doesn’t get hit on by too many guys. She probably doesn’t go out too often and works at a dead-end 9-5 job. She wants kids, at least 3. She has never had an orgasm while having sex in her life.
The dude in the center is a middle class aspiring to be CEO. I bet he got laid that night. No, not by the ugly bitch on the left, please.
The guy behind him is the raddest. Yeah, the one with the funky glasses, wacky hair and rather extensive beard. He lives in Berkeley and voted for Obama. He has a cell phone but would rather just not use it. He tried to pick Jimi on the jukebox but his future CEO buddy wanted Def Tones. They settled for White Stripes. Good compromise.
The dopey looking fuck in the back smiling like a big dork? He’s a nice guy, but has a rather small penis. Men that have small penises are fucked for life. Even in situations in which you don’t have to use their penis, they are still fucked. Never trust a man with a dick size in inches smaller than the amount of fingers on your hand.
I’m fucking serious! We’ll discuss this further why at a later time.
Oh yeah, Mr Small Cock drives a Ford F350 truck that he had raised up because him and his small penis want to feel like king of the road. He took a taxi tonight though, because he’s responsible.
Lastly the guy on the right whose face we can’t see? Fuck him, he’s not my friend, or he’d be in the shot. He has a stupid haircut anyway. I bet he shaves his chest and wears Ed Hardy t-shirts just to fit in with the rest of his yuppie friends.
Does this shot appeal to you? Or do you think it’s a piece of shit? It took minimal to zero effort to take the shot, I paid no attention to anything except my focus on the jukebox on the right.
I’ve found a shot like this you either love it or you hate it. What do you think not necessarily of this shot, but this type of shot? What exactly is the appeal? It looks like I put about 8 seconds into this and tossed it on the internet in the name of "art", doesn’t it? How come something that looks like Chloe could of done on accident looks so cool to me?