Does Marriage Counseling Work? 3 Tips To Make Sure Your Session Is Effective

Does Marriage Counseling Work? 3 Tips To Make Sure Your Session Is Effective

Does Marriage Counseling Work? 3 Tips To Make Sure Your Session Is Effective

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Home Page > Relationships > Marriage > Does Marriage Counseling Work? 3 Tips To Make Sure Your Session Is Effective


Does Marriage Counseling Work? 3 Tips To Make Sure Your Session Is Effective

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Posted: Oct 16, 2010 |Comments: 0

A common question I’ve seen people ask is ‘Does Marriage Counseling Work?’ While it is natural to ask this question, I believe a better question to ask is: “What can I do to ensure marriage counseling works for me?” Hence, I’ve chosen to share these 3 tips so you can make the most of any marriage counseling session you choose to attend.

Tip #1: Have at least one goal BEFORE you attend any counseling session.

For marriage counseling to work and be effective, couples or individuals must decide on at least one goal they would like to achieve, as a result of attending the session.

Without a goal in mind, it is impossible to determine whether marriage counseling has helped you to improve your relationship or not.

So, for example, you can decide:

– I want us to be able to talk about money calmly and rationally, without raising our voices at each other. – I want my husband to learn how to listen to me. – I want us to work out our differences and become closer. – etc…

When you and your spouse enter a counseling session with clear objectives of what you would like to achieve, your marriage counselor can help you work towards that goal.

The bottom line is: This is YOUR marriage. Don’t expect your marriage counselor to tell you what your marriage should look like. He or she can’t do that for you. Only you and your spouse can decide what is best for your partnership.

Tip #2: Don’t wait too long before going for marriage counseling.

Ideally, it is best to go for counseling when both of you are motivated to work towards a happy and healthy marriage together.

However, many couples will only turn to counseling as a last resort to save their marriage from divorce.

The problem of ‘waiting too long’ occurs when: (1) one party no longer cares about the outcome of the marriage, (2) one partner strongly believes that divorce is the only way to end their problems.

In these situations, there is no guarantee that marriage counseling will work because your marriage can’t improve as long as one partner is resisting the change. In this case, it may be useful to use marriage counseling to help your reluctant partner see the consequences of separation and divorce instead.

Tip #3: Accept that marriage counseling is a process that takes time to work.

If the problems in your marriage are quite serious, chances are it took a period of time for them to become this way.

Hence, it is unrealistic to expect one session of counseling to be a magic wand that will heal everything overnight.

As long as you set realistic and specific goals for marriage counseling, as well as give yourselves a reasonable timeline to see improvements in your relationship, you will not be disappointed.

More importantly, you need to be patient with yourself and your spouse. Give each other enough time to learn and practice new ways of communicating. Also, be sure to acknowledge your partner’s efforts.


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Rachel Mattin
About the Author:

Don’t let your marriage slip from your grasp… Do all you can to save yourself the heartache and misery of a marriage break-up. You owe it to yourself and your spouse to give it your best. You can discover the best marriage advice here and rebuild your failing relationship with your loved one by CLICKING HERE Now

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