5 Steps to Successful Online Dating
5 Steps to Successful Online Dating
Online Dating is on the rise. How can you use this dating method to your best advantage with your best foot forward?
There are several dating methods blind dates, classified ads, telephone personals, or even general grocery store pickup line dates or even the popular online dating. Each of the dating methods has its advantages and disadvantages.
Here I am going to focus on online dating. Here are five steps to successful online dating
Step 1) Specify What You Want
Decide what kind of dating or relationship you want to have
I hear you say, “What do you mean? What kind of relationship?. Dating is dating isn’t it?”. Well what I meant was, to define if you are looking for marriage-minded relationship, or long-term relationship without any marriage plans, or short-term casual dating ranging from few weeks to few months or even intimate encounters for very short-time frames such as days.
This step helps you identify what you are looking for. Why do you have to define what kind of dating or relationship you want? This way you can search for online dating sites based on your decision. There are several sites focusing on marriage minded and long term relationships. And then some, which focus on the relationships focused on casual, short term and intimate in nature
You can search on Internet search engines such as Google or Yahoo by searching with your criteria keywords within quotes such as “marriage minded dating” or “casual dating” or “intimate encounters” etc
Step 2) Select Your Dating Site
Browse each online dating site very carefully by looking at the profiles at each site and reading each profile what they are looking for in their dating partner. Some online dating sites will allow you to browse profiles without registering first. So you can use this opportunity to browse their dating profiles and assess whether that online dating site is your kind of place to hang around
A word of caution is that not all online dating sites are the same. Some are fancy. Some are quality. Some are cheap. Some are feature-rich. Some are free. Some are paid. But what matters most is for you to select the internet dating site based on what you want on Step 1) plus the features you find in each dating site which you feel will get you to whom you want to date
Step 3) Setup Your Amazing Profile
This is one of the key steps which a lot of people forget or don’t take the time to do it. Because they feel either they don’t have the time to write a detailed profile, or they think they are going to be contacting people anyway so why bother or they think what is the point etc.
Your profile is your first impression you give to a potential partner who maybe browsing that dating site when you have joined that particular dating site. When a potential partner is looking through profiles if they see an empty profile even without a picture, how could they get to know you when you don’t even present yourself let alone make ANY impression!?
So a completed profile is a must. A picture adds another thousand words to your profile. If you wish to remain anonymous in the beginning a dating profile without a picture is also ok. You can make up for it in your profile details. But please do have something in your profile without having just a single line like some people, which says “hot guy looking for a hot girl” or “are you cute? Then email me” or “sexy girl wants her cute boy friend” or “just looking”!. I even saw on one dating profile which said “oh I was lost .now I am found…let me out!”. Hmmm… if it is meant to be funny, at least make sure the sense of humor is easily understood.
Step 4) Using the Dating Site Features
As mentioned above, not all online dating sites have the same feature set. Depending on whether each dating site charges per month or whether they are free, what features they offer as part of their program will also differ
Most dating sites will allow you to post your profile for free. When you browse their existing profiles and you find a person you like to contact then most sites will not let you contact them unless you pay. If the site is a free site then they will most likely allow you to contact them.
Contacting the interested person maybe either via a “wink” or an “IM Instant Messenger” or an internal email via the site. Each of these features will be useful in their own right.
A quick and easy method to show your interest to the person you are interested is to send a “wink”‘. This way you don’t have to come up with your own ‘chat up line’ or other creative ways of getting their attention. The dating site will have predefined ‘winks’ setup so you just select one wink you like and then ‘voila!” your desired person will have got your ‘wink’.
Sometimes it is better to Instant Message a person especially if you find that person rarely comes “online” and you want to grab their attention when they are online which is quite unusual so you would like to say “hi”.
An email to the interested party is better because you can describe yourself better and plant a better ‘first impression’. The reason being if you “IM” a person and they reject you at that moment because they don’t know much about you, some sites may not allow you to contact that person again even by email. This will depend on the dating website’s sophistication of their features. Normally, you can contact that person by Instant Messaging and if they reject your IM, you can still email them.
If the online dating site you signed up is fortunate enough to have chat rooms, you can say hi in the chat room and then take the conversation to a private ‘whisper’ mode for more privacy to converse with that person in a more private setting
Step 5) Take Your Time To Get To Know
Some people who start on dating online rush into things which they later regret. It is critical that you get to know the other person very well before arranging an offline meeting in person
There are several reasons for this. Firstly, your only interaction with the person you just met on the dating site is thru Instant Message, Chat or Email or a combination of these. Sometimes you may have taken the conversation to a phone conversation by exchanging numbers or calling that person. On these mediums the other person can create quite a ‘make believe’ scenario and in the ‘heat of the moment’ of attraction with their features as they describe it, or their voice or their words might blind you from your normal logical thinking.
So it is very important to get to know them from all angles before committing to meet them in person. One of the best ways is to ask questions. Especially open ended questions. Whatever you do, do not assume anything about the other person. This is not fair on you because you are not telling yourself the truth, or the other person because you are misjudging them.
When you are ready to meet, choose a place to meet which you feel comfortable with. Be yourself, and enjoy the dating process. Best of all, have fun getting to know the other person. If it is not fun then it is not worth your time. Good Luck!
Joshua Danicio is part of the Dating Advice Team at at Loveeka.com “Find Your Love With Eureka!. She Can, He Can, You Can”. A Free Online Dating Site where users can use Wink, Instant Message, Internal Email, read free dating articles, forums, photo rating and various Singles Chat Rooms to find their Love